Not sure what I'm feeling right now. Seems like this is the only place I can vent and pour myself out because if i fucking keep this to myself, I'm gonna be messed up the whole day. Have you ever felt like no one else in this world cares about you. About what you think, or how you're feeling, or how you would put so much on the line just to get nothing in return. Been feeling like that the past few days and this is top notch. I really just feel like breaking down and crying right now. I have so much in me that I need to let out and I just can't somehow. I've been ignored, pushed around and right now I feel like I've been stomped on. I stood, for half an hour, pressing my ear so hard that it left a mark, just so I could hear better. I tried everything I can, and what do I get? Nothing. Zilch. I litterally feel weak now. I can hardly stand straight. My mind is just racing with thoughts of deep, dark, nothingness. How am I gonna get thru the day... I feel so lost. Call me emotional, but I feel unwanted. All I needed was for you to say, "Are you ok?". You're not the only going through this. And if I'm the one comforting you, and you don't do the same or at least repeat the gesture back, then where or who am I gonna get it from? So this is how I'm handling it. I'm letting it all go here. Feeling so disorientated and confused. You wouldn't even SMS to see if I'm alright. I know you won't. Sigh.. I wanna lie down but I know I have to go out already. Wish I could just lock myself away from everything. I just wanna huddle up in a corner and hide for the rest of my life. Sigh... I pray to God for now, to just let me get thru the day. Let me fine. Help me put this thoughts to rest. I might get out of hand if I don't. With no one to fall back on, all I need to do is just console myself. "Are you alright?" .. "I'm fine. Thank you for just asking. Cos that's all I needed." Fuck, I'm starting to talk to myself again. I'm going crazy aren't I? I should this right now. I have to go. No one's blaming you, though. I never have, I never will. Just ignore this if you want to. I know you'll be reading. I just needed to get this out of my system.