Summary

It's always nice reading back my old posts. There's a reason why I just left this blog as it was, never deleting any of the posts or just shutting this whole thing down. I like being reminded of the life i used to have, and the people that were once in it, no matter how crappy they treated me or how it a little bit of it still hurts when I think of them.

When I first started this blog, I was in my second relationship with a girl I managed to stay on with for 3 years. She helped me grow and come out of my shell. I dont know where she is today, but i secretly thank her for making me who i am today. To be honest, when I was with that long distance relationship with her, I seldom got around, spending most of my time on Skype trying to get as much time with her possible. And since the break up, I wallowed in self pity for half a year, before going full blast into social mode. I must admit, that year.. since my 4th year.. I've been having a blast being where I was.

My roomate never used to come back to the room. Me having the whole place to myself... was bliss. I turned into my very own bachelor pad. It was a port for everything. For people to "study", really study, a pit stop for those who needed some RnR if the lift was broken (since my floor was right in the middle). It was a port for meetings, discussions, drinking, smoking, stoning, shisha-ing, watching movies, for people to nap or spend the night if needed. It's all been done. Probably the only thing that it was, is a brothel.

During my years in Moscow, I've done so many stupid countless things, sober.. and some not.. so sober. Got involved in a few dramas, heart breaks, scandals, fights and at the end of the day it all worked out great. I had a plan. When I left Moscow, I wanted to leave it all behind. Take that final breath of Russian air and just say my goodbyes with no ties. But I did, leave a loose knot behind. And that would be my girlfriend at that time, which I had just met 2 months prior to me leaving Moscow for good. Well as you can guess how it turned out. And now I'm left still yearning. 

Update! On my current life.. 

It's been almost a year since I left Moscow, just short of a month. I've since graduated, came back home to Malaysia, signed up with the government and is now a full fledged civil servant. I've been working for a good 6 months. Single yet again. And still in search of ways to make my life as interesting as i can without my laziness getting in the way. 

I'm 26 this year. And though I have left so much of my life behind in Moscow.. I'm trying to recreate one here without losing any part of myself. Sometimes it's hard to balance everything out. I always find myself having to choose between having a life and sleeping. I love sleeping. I love being able to fall asleep and wake up, knowing i have more time to fall back asleep. Gawd, I'm so lazy.. On top of that, I still have to continuously study as a refresher and for my assessments.

Can't complain though. Life as a Houseman.. it is what it is, being half clerk, half slave. We all do what we need to get by. I'm still pretty unsure about where I'm headed. Praying in time, it'll come to me.